Loss of a job, loss of a loved one, loss of a beloved pet or just loss of joy is hard. Loss at any time is difficult. When it happens around a Holiday or significant day, it is sometimes harder. It often colors one’s view of the season, holiday or date.

As with all loss, the firsts are tough. The first Birthday without them. The first Anniversary. The first Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day etc. Each one brings it’s own sorrow and sadness.

I was able to endure each of those ‘firsts’ in different ways. Sometimes, I did a ‘Mizpah’ or good deed, in memory of the person. Other times, a gesture on someone else’s part guided me. As well, the support of dear friends was invaluable. Finding a pleasant memory or just plain JOY in the day is often times enough.

My husband became quite ill during December some years ago. His illness and eventual death after the first of the New Year had an impact on my family. It was difficult the following December to recapture the Joy of the season. December held a strong memory of his declining health and the feelings of ‘the last time’. Those are powerful emotions to encounter.  It is hard to avoid being consumed by them. Believe me though, it is possible and you will be able to survive. It may not feel like it in the moment but, trust me, you will.

6 months after he passed, I lost my job. So, yes, I know loss on many levels. 3 months after I loss my job, my mother had a stroke. She recovered much of her mobility but it took it’s toll on her and, 8 months later, just after Mother’s Day, she passed. So in 18 months, I had lost my husband, a job and my mother.

Find Joy where you can.

Surround yourself with caring friends.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help with your feelings.

If you feel the need to just have a crying session, GO FOR IT.

If you’d like, to leave me a comment,  I’ll write back to you if you’d like. I’ve been there and have come out on the other side.

Mourning Light

The soft glow of Life and Love is guiding me out of the abyss of mourning.
Inching my way emerging with open heart and hands to that which is offered.
Joy and peace my mantra.
I have survived and embrace this beginning.